Thursday, September 1

Begin Again Being Grateful

I went and got my hair done yesterday. Sam has been doing my hair for almost 7 years now, and she is amazing.
I always look forward to hair day, I feel so pretty after and it's always wonderful getting to catch up with the girls. Laughing and telling stories.

But Yesterday when I left I was very aware that I wasn't laughing. Yesterday I didn't leave filled and refreshed like I normally do.

I sat in the truck after and replayed the last hour and a half in my head. I replayed the conversation and then got to thinking about the last year of conversations while I have been with Sam on hair day... and I realized how depressing conversation with me must have been. Sam, of course would never complain, she just loves the way Sam does, kindly and with patience. She just says "You have had a rough year." But the truth is, I am not the same. I have not been the same in a while, and I think a huge part of that is I have stopped being grateful. In its place I have become angry, I complain, I only see the negative and am just generally unpleasant to be around. I realized that for the entire hour and a half I sat in that salon chair I did nothing to lighten anyone else's load. All I did was be negative about a vast array of things. A buffet of bummer!!
I have somewhere in this last few months/year stopped being a bucket filler, stopped being fun, stopped being happy and full of gratitude for the little things. I don't think I could have not changed, but I forgot to be in charge of my change.

 I have become what I hate... a life sucker, one of those people who drains you when they are around.

So after hair day yesterday I realized I need to get back to work with being grateful.

Gratitude makes what we have enough. It makes what I have enough.

Gratitude changes the way we see things. It has changed the way I see things.

It has worked for me before, so, I'm going to begin again.

Three things every day that I am grateful for. Starting now. I will work to get back to that place I use to be.

Today:

I am grateful I get to decided how my life looks.

I am grateful for real cream for my coffee. The half and half just isn't the same.

I am grateful for music sent by friends who get it.

J