Tuesday, March 17

Then We Decided To Sell A House....

After living in a house for as long as we have lived in our place, I expected there would be a lot of work involved in cleaning it and getting it "show ready" but I had no idea just how much effort and work would need to go into getting this old place presentable.

It has taken 2 months, 5 truck loads to the dump, 2 truck loads to the nearest goodwill store, numerous items sold on a local buy and sell, roughly 40 hours of muscle power....and it is FINALLY ready.

I didn't think I would ever get here. To be honest, there were many many times I wanted to throw in the towel and I thought,"this place isn't THAT small...the kids can just sleep by the freezer."

But perseverance and hard work prevailed and this place is de-cluttered, organized and ready for viewing!

The for sale sign is up *cue trumpet* let the showings begin!!

This sounds easier said then done. I didn't realize what a HUGE pain in the A$$ this was going to be.
Showing your home when you have children is exhausting. People only want to come see your home around the time they are home from work and after they have eaten dinner OR right before dinner...which, coincidentally,  is the same time YOU get home and finish dinner OR are about to start cooking dinner.

My first showing went smashingly. *eyeroll*

I got a text from my agent that I had 2 showings on this particular Saturday starting at 3:15pm and ending at 4:30.

Ok..no problem. I finish work at 2pm, I can boot it home for 2:30pm, Clean up the house a little and be out of there by 3pm.
The kids and I will drive around town (it was beautiful out) we will also go get groceries for dinner that night. No problem....

Then, while I am running around the house barking orders at everyone, "mom, there are people standing outside" Come on Ethan, don't joke!
"No mom, there really is people outside"

The 3:15 showing shows up at 2:50, and I am not finished cleaning up things because I just walked in the door from my drive home


 So, in a calm and composed manner that I have mastered over all these years of EMS, parenting and problem solving ....I yell at the kids in a tone used to alert people that they are literally on fire, to grab their shoes and to run out to the van, passing the potential home buyers as I am running with sweat dripping from my flustered forehead.
We jumped into the van, started it up and drove down the street.

This might sound shocking, but I was a tad frazzled at this moment. I Know I Know, I hid it very well. a few deep breaths and we return to zen.

We drive to Tim Hortons, get drinks, cruze around town a billion times (it takes exactly 5 minutes to go around the entire town once) and then go get groceries. We return to the house at 4:23pm and there is no one there. PERFECT! It was suppose to go until 4:30 but finished early so we all go in and resume our lounging. I walk straight upstairs to disrobe from my day at work and put on relaxing clothes, while the kids all return to their previous activities draped on different items of furniture to await dinner.

As all my lady friends understand, the second the bra comes off and the tank top and sports bra is put on,  I am in for the night! With the clothes and ladies unmentionables thrown on the floor I am now in the kitchen with a glass of red and I am browning the meat for dinner.

It is roughly 4:43 now and I text my Realtor to ask why there was only one business card left (it is customary that the agent representing the people seeing a house to leave a business card)...had the second showing not come? It was  in that moment of anticipation,  after my text was sent and I saw the response bubble appear from his response that Ethan says to me, for the second time this afternoon, "MOM..There are people at the door again"

I looked at my phone and my Realtor had written back, "they are there now!!"

I instantly felt sick.

 I open the door in my lounge clothes, nasty bra and matching look on my face to an overly pushy woman saying they had ran a little late and could we still see the house?

I was NOT impressed. But I didn't know what to do, so I let them in. I awkwardly went back to the kitchen while this woman loudly went on and on about how LOVELY my home was...
The children just sat silently on the couch and I returned to cooking, while strangers walked around my home judging and looking at my stuff.

They walked upstairs and that's when I remembered my underthings on the floor. I became even more uncomfortable and could not look the man in the eye when they came back down stairs and started asking me questions about the house.

I just wanted to die. Do NOT ask me about how good the wifi is when you just saw my paisley print panties. and there are only a few things you are allowed to say to me after you look at my bra, and I'll let you know that NONE of them involve the toilet.

After this awkwardness was all over all I could do was tell the kids how sorry I was. We all just reiterated that this was for the "greater good" and laughed. My laughing faded to  weeping sobs when I went upstairs and saw there was pee on the toilet seat...

Please, dear powers of the universe...let this house sell quickly so I don't need to do this anymore!


I am grateful for people who make me laugh and that can laugh at themselves.

I am grateful for happy children.

I am grateful for texting. When Jason is gone it's nice to chat throughout the day.



TJ said...

I remember those days so well, especially when we were getting our house ready for sale in Peace River and we had 3 teenage girls with "stuff". So while we had not pee on the toilet seat, there was plenty of embarrassing moments before all was said and done and the SOLD sign went up. My heart goes out to you. It truly does. And I only had 3 to content with. Grab your cape next time you leave your underwear on the floor!

Victoria Heinicke said...

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