Monday, April 8

The Weird Non Apology Apology I Got...

I received a face book message the other night from a woman I have not spoken to more then 5 times in my entire life and the last time was years ago. I have no context for receiving this random letter either.
I have thought it over long and hard and I have decided to share it will everyone along with my feelings concerning it.

I am happy. I work hard at a job that I love and find fulfillment in. I have good people in my life and I enjoy my time with them. When I received this it really upset me, it shouldn't have, but it did. I felt sick to my stomach that there are a group of women in the world who once were friends of mine that are now sitting around with nothing better to do then gossip and say hurtful things about me and my children, and about my life that none of them know (or have cared to ask) about.  I do not know why this was sent to me, it was hurtful and manipulative and mean. But now I will learn from it. I will also teach my children form this as well. So I do thank you for that.

May I suggest, for the future, reading a book, learning to paint, possibly even starting a hobby. Watch the news or read a news paper, heck even learn a joke or two so you will have some sort of educated content for the next gathering you attend. Doing that will help you have meaningful things to discuss instead of just gossiping about others.

As my grandmother use to say, "Strong minds discuss world events and ideas, feeble minds discuss people."

Why as women do we error on the side of such passive aggressive behavior, just to make ourselves feel better?



I am grateful for the people who are in my life. Strong and intelligent and kind people.


Phedra said...

Stay Strong Joelle!!!

Leah M said...

WOW. Thats all I can say. Wow.

Anonymous said...

WOW is right! I occasionally have stumbled on your blog through people we know, I'm a bit of a blogaholic. You don't know me and we have never met face to face but I had to comment because I seriously just laughed out loud while shaking my head at this post. Wow talk about passive aggressive behaviour! Whoever this person is does not seem to be acting manipulatively or passive aggressively towards you, rather they seem to truly be trying to change and apologizing for a really hard habit to break. I mean what person have you ever in your life met that did not participate in gossip, either by speaking it or listening to it. You obviously know this person better than I so maybe there is background I don't know about but from what I read this person sounds genuine. The Wow part for me is this post is Riddled with YOUR passive aggressive and manipulative action. So I ask YOU, Why do we as women error on the side of such passive aggressive behaviour? Pot meet Kettle. I find it strange you so obviously don't see your own aggression behind your responses to whoever this poor soul is. Maybe rethink your own intentions before attacking someone who is just trying to be a better person.

Anonymous said...

Wow! You're such a kind & mature person to post this private conversation all over the web! Thanks for giving me one more reason to not like you.

Anonymous said...

I can so relate! I was just at a work conference with former and current co-workers. A lot are (were deleted shortly after) on my Facebook page and yet could not be bothered to talk to me. Same with my current co-workers including my boss. I am sick of people not acting how they truly are. If you a person who chooses to gossip about me and all my "faults" then don't act like you are my friend. Thought all this stuff ended in high school but I guess only some of us have grown into kind human beings aka ADULTS.