Friday, June 29

Day 1 Of Summer Vacation.


*Disclaimer* For those of you who read my blog as a "pick me up" perhaps you might not want to read for a few weeks. For the next little while writing for me will be for the sole purpose of trying to not lose my mind. More than likely it will not be uplifting or pleasant. If you continue on don't say I did not warn you.

This morning when I woke up the realization Maclean was not here anymore hit almost instantly. The peaceful and calm feelings that normally accompany the early morning rise on a day off has been replaced with instant anxiety and the dread of knowing I am going to have to talk myself through every step of this day. I am already exhausted thinking about the arduous task at hand and I have been up for exactly 4 minutes.  I find the way the human heart works to be so fascinating, emotions and feelings are powerful things.

The kids are really excited to have time off and thankfully their energy and happiness rubs off a little... let me rephrase, I need their energy and happiness to rub off. I am so glad they are going to spend the next few weeks with their dad, they will have so much fun.

I have decided I am going to make a list of things I need to do/finish this month. A "TO DO" list is exactly what I need. Projects to focus on and things to keep my mind busy should help. I hope it helps.

I will work on my list today.

Today:

I am grateful for being taken out for lunch yesterday, sorry I was not better company.

I am grateful for Sam who got me new sunglasses. I really like them. Ooh and thanks for letting me come over after work today and wash my clothes:)

I am grateful for the music Jennifer keeps sending me every day to pick me up. You have great taste and I really appreciate it.

J

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