Friday, June 10

Today I felt like being me was finally enough

What another great day. To say this last few days has been a whirlwind of emotion and excitement would be a gross understatement. I still feel like a stunned deer caught in headlights. Might be similar to the deer the Britt's smoked the other night... I'm just saying.


Today I went into 102.3 NOW radio to spend some more time with Chris,  the host I might get to work with. 
He has been so kind, and patient. I really enjoy chatting with him, and I really appreciate his willingness to give this a try. 
When I went in today Chris and I did a mock show and it was taped. We would talk about things and get a feel for each other. It was really fun. He let me try taking the lead with songs, and topics, and it felt nice. I would hardly say natural, but it was nice and got easier the more time we worked on it. 


My mic in the little room Chris and I worked in. 






This is a better picture of the room.






After we finished (about an hour) Chris and I went to go see The Boss, and then we all went and listened to the tape. In essence I was about to be judged, thankfully my last 15 years of church attendance has prepared me well for judgment from others,  so it was not a big deal. 


What I found amazing was when the boss would say things like, "It sounds good, and will just keep getting better the more you do it", suggesting to me that he has still not come to his senses and wants me to come back, even more increasing the level of my being stunned. 


Is this really happening to me?


When today was over, he asked me to return again on Saturday. Shocked and still in disbelief,  I took a drive.
I went to the Italian store and walked up and down the isles reading the boxes and trying to say the words with the Italian flare I love to listen to so much. 


While I was walking, the thought crossed my mind. This happened because I was being 100% me. My blog, the day I got to be an intern, was all genuinely me. No pretenses, not fluff, nothing fake. This is because this man, "The Boss" sees value in me, just the way I am. I am good enough. 


Now, I have no idea what is going to come from all of this, nothing is for sure. But regardless, I was given a chance because I put myself out there, I tried. I dreamed!


This might end in a big fiery mess, or it might not. Either way, I see myself a little differently. I am standing a little taller today. 
Today was a great day. 
This was a powerful realization for me. That dreams matter, being yourself matters, and when you put yourself out into the world, the real you, things will happen. 


I feel like I am finally beginning to see who I really am. There are a lot of titles I hold: Mother, wife, sister, friend, but there is so much more depth to Joelle, and I am starting to see that. I feel like I am only scratching the surface of what I am capable of, and the level of happiness I can achieve and deserve. 


J


Today:
I am grateful for this chance, for Adam letting me be an intern one day, and for supportive friends and readers.


Taz, Adam, and Chris on Air.


I am grateful that this crazy situation offers hope to others about good things happening. Good things do happen!


I am grateful for the well fitted white shirt I found on sale yesterday. It felt great today.




I am grateful for this single cannoli that helped end my wonderful day at the radio station.





4 comments:

Percy2626 said...

That is wonderful Joelle. Glad you are finally starting to see what the rest of us see and believe about you. Have an awesome weekend!

The Straights said...

What a fantastic day! Joelle, I'm grateful for your gift of words. You truly have a way of pulling us "little people" along with you. I feel what you feel and I can live your excitement with you. You deserve this, and being you is enough! And you look SMOKIN' hot!!

Amy said...

Ummm, did you not read my prediction yesterday??? ;)
I agree with Mel too, you DO look smokin hot!

Leah M said...

Smokin hot, yeah, yeah, but what about that cannoli!!!
;)
XO Leah